[Friday survival check in] love is all I have...

[tomakeanoffer]

It's that time of week again. Here's to hoping yours has been a decent one.

So, if you are not familiar, this post is
• for being excited about the things you've done this week
• for asking for help if you need it
• for venting about anything that mind need to be flailed over (but do let us know if you just need to vent, or if you'd like advice).
• for showing off something cool you've done/made/experienced this week.
• for being generally enthused and excited about things that have happened.
• for just being thrilled that you survived.

Come drop into the comments and let us know how you're doing and how things have gone.  If you need cheer leading or anything, feel free to say so, or if you just want to vent and don't want any advice or anything, let us know.

I do ask that if you have any triggering topics, that you mention them in the subject line, or first line of your comment. This is just so people can make informed decisions on what to read and keep everyone okay. <3 Thank you so much.

Comments

[tomakeanoffer]

Good things:
- Twizzlers
- Creative endeavors.
- So much coffee.
- Productivity Alchemy.

Grateful things:
- My mother not being an awful perosn
- My partner being an amazing person.
- My brain for not hating me even though I failed to take my meds for like a week.
- Music (Right now Let Me Love by ARCHIS bcause it's been stuck in my head).

[analise010]

I'm trying very hard to keep an open mind, to practice patience and faith and wait for my blessing to come through. I saw sister-person last weekend and we have the most fun together. I scheduled my driver's test for next month because so many job postings want a license, even if you're unlikely to use it. I'm investing in my creativity. I'm feeling my feelings wholly, instead of trying to push them down in pursuit of a "greater goal." I finally feel READY to move on to the next phase in my life, but when oh WHEN will she turn up???

I just... it's hard. The goal is 20 applications and/or 4-6 dedicated hours per day, and wondering if that's enough. There are 24 hours in a day, so I can do more, right??? Am I applying for the right things? WHERE DID I GO WRONG IN THE PAST??? DX

[analise010]

WOOHOO!!! Coffee, creativity, and music are the trifecta for a happy life. :)

[itsamellama]

Aww yis <3

[itsamellama]

Yay Things
- I managed to finish two scenes for a thing.
- ... and read through the comments for a short story I was invited to submit to a local anthology. Need to revise it over the weekend!!! Here's hoping it gets in!!
- I got an inquiry from a local publisher about the thesis novel I've been crying over lmfao... oh my goodness??
- Initial inks for four new stickers woooo
- I have chocolate and coffee
- I am trying to write literally at least just one short scene on said thesis novel and. Just trying to be a human.

[tomakeanoffer]

It's so hard to have the new things not come when you want them to. I try and tell myself that there is a reason they're not here yet but it is still difficult all the same. I believe with all my heart though, that you will get your good. Your change is coming an d it will be glorious.

[tomakeanoffer]

Yesss, it was good.

[tomakeanoffer]

Mmmmmhm, it is good times.

[tomakeanoffer]

Trying to be a person is *hard* but you are doing it and that is awesome. <33333

[analise010]

Chocolate? Coffee? Stickers? Sounds like a good time to me. ♥

[hitokage]

So since last week, we've made huge progress on our fundraiser (I've cried twice), but we've still got a bit to go, so more signal boosting for that would be much appreciated.

And as long as I'm pimping things, I'm also on Patreon: E.R. Moreno on Patreon. I have not yet switched to charge-up-front, so you can pledge now and peek around first, pay later. I, uh, need to do a graphics update, since I'm not actively working on Vampires Three Jewels right now, but spoons.

I made coffee, scooped kitty litter, and did a load of dishes (by hand, we don't have a machine) and I am now official Done For the Day because wow did that use up spoons my cough doesn't want me to have. I, uh, need to write, but I'm not sure how much will get written.

[hitokage]

Twizzlers are always good. As is good music. And coffee. Actually, if I had all three of those right now, I'd be pretty good too.

*hugs if wanted*

[hitokage]

sounds like lots of yay things! Yay! *insert kermit flail here* Little bites can eat the mountain, tho, so you can do it!

[summerstorm]

tw: some talk about drinking (positive progress), and the edit has a bunch of shit about cyberbullying? cyberstalking? bit of both.

I played guitar a couple times this week! I need to tune it again, but still. Fun. I'm glad to have that back. I missed it a lot. And it's been hard to find time because I keep getting up late as hell. But I keep getting up late as hell because I keep going to sleep late as hell, which is bad, but brought about by drinking less and being really into my Pretty Little Liars rewatch (I'm still a season off from where I left off), so the whole thing is like... half what are you doing, and half you're doing pretty well considering. I'm not sure where to put it. I'm not proud of my messed up sleep schedule but I'm proud of the steps I'm taking that are also backfiring that way, so?

I think a company is sending me markers for either handlettering or coloring or both. It was very casual (more of a 'sending samples' thing than a proper blog collab; no fee involved or anything, but also no required work on my part) but I'll take it.

So re: advice, my grandma moved out last month and the day right after, I was motivated enough even through a huge blow-up with my mom to clean half my room - the half that wasn't full of my sister's things - and dealing with all the furniture on my own. I did this because I didn't want more bullshit if I asked for help, and I knew if I waited, I would lose the motivation and put it off forever. That's what I'm doing with the other half of the room, which my sister vacated a couple Saturdays later. I hate cleaning, and I don't know how to make myself do it. I want to do it all in one go, with gloves, and it can't possibly be that bad, it wasn't that bad last time and I was cleaning walls and floor debris then, which is not the case now. Right now, it's just cleaning shelves. Dusting. And then rearranging all my crap, which I LIKE to do. But the cleaning. God. How do I make myself do this?

Edit: I also ended up asking for money on my public twitter at one point, which is another thing that's hard to call 'good' or 'bad'? Like, I felt pretty anxious about it the next day, almost deleted it, and I haven't retweeted it again or anything. A friend sent me £10, that was sweet. I ended up deleting most of the follow-up tweets, but left the one with my paypal.me up. I think some part of me was trying to reclaim my honesty. I've been struggling with that for a couple of years, but a lot more since my trolls torpedoed my relationship last summer. I don't miss the relationship, but I miss not feeling so fucking paranoid about something that used to come easy to me, that used to be this thing where I said, this needs to be talked about, and I'm in a perfect position to talk about it because I am so sure of myself that it doesn't hurt me. And these days, it's more like, I hope I've blocked enough people by now and I won't feel compelled to *look* for people hating me. I would love to think they don't care about me anymore but most of those people should have stopped caring about me years ago and they still fucking contacted my ex's friend to fuck with me (they've also contacted clients in the past, which is why I can't share in-progress things anymore) and sharing things from my private twitter (this was the point at which I deleted that, and my old tumblr, and my livejournal, and got a new private twitter and got extra paranoid).

But, I'm not checking. I could, and I'm not. I don't even know if the worst offender is even involved in the forum I know about. But I'm not checking anyway, and I left the thing up. I think that's good?

[summerstorm]

I asked my mom for help with the cleaning and she said she could if she felt all right and it was at a reasonable time, so... that's progress I guess? I'm not sure how much that's gonna help though, unless she does all the cleaning. Which I didn't straight-out ask her to do. But I'd do all the tidying, so that would still be... her helping? And she mostly hindered with the other 70% of the room shit? Eh. IDK. At least I asked and she said yes.

[yhlee]

Despite a bad brain day, I am up and working on thumbnails for an art class assignment. And this also despite the fact that I haaaaate thumbnailing. I know why it's useful and important! I just don't enjoy it.

Also I did the dishes, so hey. ^_^

[tomakeanoffer]

I would offer to share, if I could. <3

hugssss!

[tomakeanoffer]

<33333 Yay good things! I am so happy things are going well and I send so much love your way.

(Now in the proper journal. XD)

[tomakeanoffer]

*hugging, all the hugging. So much hugging.* I really hope your mom turns out to be useful and not like, making you regret bringing her into this. And just...There are wishes for good things, so mnay good things.

[tomakeanoffer]

I am so bad at thumbnailing. It just doesn't click in my brain but I totally see why it is useful.

Yay dishes! Go you!

[alexseanchai]

catch a secret that could set you free (2356 words) by AlexSeanchai
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Miraculous Ladybug
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Adrien Agreste/Marinette Dupain-Cheng
Characters: Adrien Agreste, Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Alya Césaire, Nino Lahiffe
Additional Tags: assume spoilers through s02 Captain Hardrock, definitely spoilers for s02 Sapotis, (netflix where is the rest of the season), Fluff, Puns & Word Play
Summary:

"You know what would help? If we could contact each other when we're not suited up. And Rena, too."

"...Chat, what did you do."

"One phone, two lines. Three heroes. Tell me I'm a genius."

"For what?"

[summerstorm]

I don't even know what thumbnailing is, entirely. Aren't there apps that do it automatically these days? Am I thinking of something else?

Go you, though!

[yhlee]

If you mean apps that generate thumbnail views of existing art, there probably are! But this is for art creation, and I don't think you can fully automate that--if you're, say, illustrating Cinderella, then you come up with small "thumbnail"-sized sketches of your concepts and work up a bunch of those before deciding which one(s) to take to the next level with detail & values & so on. This article explains it better than I do, with some great examples.

Thanks!

[summerstorm]

I don't think I will, because mostly my issue with it is that I don't contribute a hell of a lot in terms of household chores and neither does anybody else, so I hate asking my mom for extra work? Like, yeah, she can be horrible, but she doesn't deserve to have to do so much. But she's also the only person who would help me with this, and I need someone to just make me start. Now I just need to get up in the actual morning at some point.

Thank you so much. <3333

[summerstorm]

Oh, yeah, that's totally something I had no idea was a thing. I'm not an artist (I do photography and I do design work, which does involve something LIKE thumbnailing, I just never thought to call it that; I call it rough sketches for logos and outlines for print design), so thank you so much for the explanation!

[summerstorm]

You're doing great. I'll share your fundraiser on my public twitter in a sec. Good luck!

[summerstorm]

Can I use your twitter handle? I found one on the Patreon page, but I don't know if you want that connected to the fundraiser.

[hitokage]

Yes, by all means~ That's where I've been sharing it as well.