No Endgame spoilers, just me babbling a little

[tomakeanoffer]

Re: Endgame

I'm choosing not to engage with it. I'm doing this for my own mental health because like, I've read the spoilers and I'm Not. Here. For. It.

I appreciate that you may have your squee and I'm not going to harsh it in any way, but I am choosing to not see it and engage with Endgame related content.

I feel bad about this, I really do. I wanted to be excited for it but I...can't deal with it right now. Tbh, I feel guilty about it but I'm trying to remind myself that I am doing my best for me, rather than doing what i feel obligated to do.

So yeah, that is my relationship with this movie.

Comments

[worlds_of_smoke]

If anyone shames you for taking care of your mental health, point me in their direction and I will personally kick their ass. You really shouldn't feel bad about the fact that you can't engage with the movie at the moment. -offers hugs- Characters mean something to people and you're not the only one who is hurt by where the writers went.

[tomakeanoffer]

<33333 I'm taking care of myself and I am reminding myself of that every time I have to back away from some stuff.

I *know* I am not in a place right now for some of that content and I'm (mostly) okay with it but like...yeah

[worlds_of_smoke]

It's hard! It really is. I watched Rachel struggle with this for one particular canon, so I know it's hella easy to slide into being upset with yourself because you're upset.

Society tells us it's "just a story" but, for some people, it's not. That's okay. We're emotional creatures. It's in our nature to get emotionally involved. I'm just glad you're aware enough to know that you can't deal with the emotional impact the movie will likely have on you right now. ♥ If you never get to that point, that's okay, too.

[auroracloud]

I'm not at all in the fandom and haven't seen any of the movies, but I'd just like to give you support for putting your mental health first. You're just being responsible towards yourself by not engaging with something that you know at this point would hurt you. Don't let anyone shame you into thinking you "should" see it or should feel worse about yourself for not seeing it. As nice as fandom is, some general feeling of fannish "obligation" is never a good reason to harm your own mental health. Also, I've browsed through the main spoilers due to general curiosity and I totally get why you don't want to deal with that at the moment.

I also have a bit of the same thing with regards to generally engaging with the SFF reader "fandom" by reading new published SFF, trying to vote in the Hugos, etc. There are some books I just can't read because they're too dark and violent for me or otherwise include content I can't deal with (well, generally it's the "too dark and violent" thing) and I'm choosing to just not read those no matter how much people gush about their amazingness. And I sometimes have to make effort to come to terms with that, to not feel guilty about it, but it's worth it. Also, then there's more left in me to love the stuff that is for me.

*hugs*

[tomakeanoffer]

Ngl, I really hate the pressure there is to consume ALL THE THINGS in SFF fandom, especially the things that might seem dark or upsetting to an individual. Like, I enjoy the dark and upsetting but not everyone does and no one should feel like they have an obligation to engage with content that will cause them distress. This is why I will actively avoid pushing horror on anyone who says they are not into it.

That is their choice and I respect that. You know your limits better than I (or most anyone) does. Take care of yourself first, consume the media that will either bring you joy or, if you are that sort, challenge you in a healthy way.

[mmouse15]

Please don't feel badly about this. Your mental health is more important that staying current with whatever media it is. After all, it's supposed to be something fun, not a burden or detriment to you.

[tomakeanoffer]

<33333 I only feel marginally bad, tbh. Fandom at large isn't' worth my mental health or motivation

[flybirds]

You, yo, we can both squee at all the other things in the universe (icecream. So many flavors. Yum yum. Soft velvety things. New scents. Seasons changing. Some more greatness. The blue skiies. Every other movie. Booooks.) ...

Cough, that was just saying, there with you with avoidMCU bag.
& That there is so much of utter greatness & giggles to be had, that leaving one movie out is like, not missing out on anything in the universe.

... and icecream.

[tomakeanoffer]

Ice creeeeeam. This is a good plan

[teaotter]

*so much sympathy*

I had to bail on MCU canon ages ago, because I couldn't watch the movies and have fun with what the characters were going through. Maybe I'm not supposed to feel that these people are my friends, but I do. I don't want to see my friends go through these things.

You should be free to make choices about media based on what you want, not just on what you need -- but when you need, you should definitely get to protect yourself.

[tomakeanoffer]

I do not blame you for breaking up long before now, honestly. Morbid fascination kept me going more than anything but I had to detach long before now. Even then, hearing what happened in Endgame, with how my mental health has been recently... I just was not going to put myself through that.

[shanaqui]

Right there with you. And relieved you said it so I didn't feel alone with it, actually.

[tomakeanoffer]

<3 I totally understand and if there's anything I can do to help you, let me know. It's rough, it really is, and my brain is actively Not Okay when I think too hard about the movie, so seriously? You are not alone.

[shanaqui]

♥

[dhampyresa]

Entirely fair. I'll be sure to keep everything under a cut/labeled from now on.

[tomakeanoffer]

<3333 You're doing fine and tbh, I don't expect anyoen to take more care than they have been, I'm just choosing to not poke too closely because yeah. Brains are terrible.

[longmagpieroads]

You are doing the best for you!!

[tomakeanoffer]

<33333

[squeemu]

I'm glad you're taking care of yourself first!!! I haven't been following any of the Marvel storylines, just dipped in for Thor: Ragnarok and Black Panther, but from what I've heard from a friend I trust, they went in some very bad directions. It's okay to not engage and also okay to even feel betrayed by the producers.

[tomakeanoffer]

Yeah, I am glad i chose not to prod it, tbh. Like, I've heard things that I know will hurt me and not do good things in my brain, so I am doing what I can tot take care of myself.